His ''promise'' [haha] which I like most now is... "I think it's enough for us to have just one child..kesian abang tengok ayang ni..." I don't know whether he was trying to soothe me or what, but I think I'll feel enough with just a baby insyaAllah :)

I hate it when I'm nasty especially to abang. I really hate it when I can see the pain in his eyes to bear with me. I really hate it when I can't even control my own physical and emotional strength.. And due to that, currently I want to be far far far away from him until I'm all done with the pregnancy, just to avoid hurting him. Pregnancy is indeed a test. It tests my patience, abang's patience.. it tests our iman. It tests our relationship and how far we manage to sacrifice for each other..

I have improved a lot, really I have. But I still can't tolerate most food. My greatest achievement so far ehehe- I prepared nasi maglubah for abang and his friends yesterday.. but I couldn't eat it myself anyway. Abang minta aku suapkan, I said makan sendiri (jahatnye huuu) sebab I can't stand the smell. Abang kissed my cheek and I cried because his smell induced the nausea. Today I cook chicken curry with potatoes, it smells really tasty but when I tried to eat the chicken, i Just felt like vomiting so I eat the potato only. But when I'm sick, I cried to him, lapar pun ngadu kat abang jugak... moga baby dilindungi dari jadi mengada-ngada macam mommy huu

I'm really looking forward the days when I can laugh and smile with abang again, when I can stop frowning and snapping at people, when I can be cheeky with my baby, when I can treat abang as how he should be treated- like a king and make him happy... when I can enjoy all the wonderful things in life, when I can be a grateful and grateful servant of Him... may Allah help me go through this smoothly huuu


Salwa Sofian said...

Salam maryam..

reading all your stories.
i shared all your feelings.
sedih[sian] tgk awak saket.
happy bile u get to be beside your hubby.
and etc~

anyway... Mabruk alaikum atas anugerah Illahi yang paling berharga~

Moga Allah terus mengurniakan ketabahan/kekuatan untuk awak menghadapi those pregnancy sickness.


nhanunmr said...

nak panggil ape ye?akk i guess? k.maryam :)
lame dh,jadi silent reader blog akk.hehe..sgt nice blog akk!but this time,nk drop by nk sgt wish mabruk2!dh pregnant..hehe

org kate makin susah kita nak dpt sesuatu,makin kita syg..syg lebih kat baby akk nnti kan?

mOga akk sentiasa kuat.msti baby akk nk ckp..."stay strong ye,mommy!"hehe..rabbuna yusahhil,ukhti~

salam ukhuwah dari alex,egypt :)