On this very date, few years back when I was still semi fresh in 1st year (2 years of matriculation didn't make me all that fresh), I made a big decision in life- choosing a boat which I can ride for as long as it continues to move on.. I paid the expensive fee of a lifelong commitment, I gave the assurance to make a sacred vow which merges 2 hearts into 1, I dared myself to brave every single challenge that would come.. and 2 families met, to witness such humble union.. and I was engaged to an honourable man, Muhammad al-'Athiq Marzuki..
My usual way of waking abang up is not by the soft line of "Sayang, bangun tahajjud jom" but in an anxious (of course accompanied by a vigorous body shake), "Abang, BANGUN!!! DAH TERANG!!!!" Sigh, sigh again~
Subuh is now at 4am. 5.30am is something like 8am in Malaysia huu. And mind you, Subh is inching towards 3.30am.. Tahajjud pukul berapa pula..?
There is 1 line which some people might use but I don't prefer, "I'm just not cut out to wake up early you know. That's why I don't do qiyamullail". Well perhaps that is true since Rasulullah said whoever is unable to wake up early, perform the nawafil prayer before going to bed. That's our case for the time being huhuuu sedihnya~. Just 1 thing, a skill or a kelebihan is something that everybody has to earn. Some people might say, "I'm not cut out to wake up early for Subuh you know" Gulp that sounds so annoying indeed. Everybody has to work hard to gain something you know. Even to attain hidayah, you have to ASK ALLAH for it and do something!!! Takkan nak bertapa tunggu pencerahan agung sampai keikhlasan beribadah menyelinap ke dalam hati..ye tak?
Life requires mujahadah. MuJAhaDaH. MUJAHADAH!!! Currently feeling so ANNOYED with MYSELF huuu~
Alhamdulillah today marks the finish line of my 2nd week in Jordan. My version of elective isn't much a ward posting hehe. I went to the hospital for only a day in the 1st week as we were unable to find the secretary to help me to settle down. Second week could be summarized as 2/5 of attendance hehe again. Well it has nothing obvious to do with lazy (of course it's got a lazy-istic tint which isn't that obvious to anybody other than abang). I went there on Sunday (and got back early to prepare for Abang's Birthday celebration), was told not to come on Monday and Tuesday as all the specialists were busy with the residency exam, came back on Wednesday, managed to clerk a case of SLE and join a very interesting round in the CCU and learn to interpret ECG, went to meet the secretary again and was told not to come on Thursday as again they were having the residency exam. The whole next week will be the final year exam (something like our Professional exam) and now I'm thinking of whether I should you-know act hardworking and volunteer to go to the ward or just reveal my true colours and stay at home haha.
1 thing, I already got my bajeh!! (Hospital ID/ badge) [all smiles]
Today is abang's last day of class. He'll be having a revision week before the IM exam, followed by another revision week before the final exam, combining all the 4th year postings (IM, Paeds & Surg). and me? The boredom is mounting and threatening to reach the limit. Serious tersgt bosan when abang keeps looking at his lethal stack of notes and deciding how can he finsih them up in time.. (and sometimes deciding which ones can be sacrificed and pretend as if they don't exist at all uh-uh). I help him by not being a nuisance..indeed me having an REM sleep during all his study hours is a big help I guess :p I'm still in the holiday mood, refusing to give my best in the ward postings..and in self-studying at home. Elective has its own downside- nurturing a couch potato. With the still-cold weather, hibernating seems to be the best option. I still put on my wooly socks, and use the water heater for my bath. Not feeling myself, thanks to the big oral ulcer. So is abang with the gingivitis secondary to impacted molar tooth.. never mind, an expiation of sin insyaAllah :)
I rarely get the chance to update the blog.. or is it because of the lazy thing [GROAN again]. Obviously abang is not around now thus the new post :p. I'm really moody for no apparent reason, it's the hormonal thing I guess. Abang is now in the mosque, performing his Isya' prayer, but it's hard to let him go even for a split second... how horrible does that sound.. him going to the mosque make me cry.. obviously not something that sprout from happiness. Don't get me wrong though... [sedih.. knape takde mujahadah langsung???]
Finished watching Cinta Sempurna (a movie by Ust Hasrizal- I mean his novel). Have to admit the quality is not that good, but the message in the story is far better than other movies. [walaupun menonton dengan penuh emosi sehingga abang terpkasa pause2 kan cerita demi memberi ruang utk bertenang huuu]
A human is 1 creature that never fails to be ungraceful to Allah.... me already missing home and family...Thinking of how can I have both (them and abang) simultaneously.... not possible for the time being... :(
Congratulations to those new mommies and daddies.. including Nadiah and Izani :) Happy for them.. Next..wani in the line hehe. Be super muslim mums and dads k, to produce super muslim kids insyaAllah :) Abang & Me- talking about babies a lot these days.. bila la nak ada rezqi ye..[smile]. There was one day when he woke up from sleep and said
"Abang mimpi kita dpt baby"
Me: Baby apa?
Me: [all smile] hehe
Then the next day I woke up from sleep and said
"Ayang mimpi dpt baby"
Abang: Baby apa?
Hahaha sesungguhnya ini bukanlah tanda kenabian iaitu mimpi yg benar. totally unreliable geee. And the famous household question (practically asked every day): Bila nak buat pregnancy test?
Hehehe sesungguhnya kami mcm org yg sgt kemaruk nak baby, funny :p
Abang: Kalau 70 orang boleh ke?
One of the sceneries that I manage to appreciate on my way to..and back from the hospital.. ARAB BADWI!!! Truly I've never expected that they still exist huu..
Me in front of King Abdullah University Hospital which is attahed to Jordan University of Science and Technology.. By the word 'attached', I really mean they are attached physically :)
Still in the hospital, deciding to go back early haha..to do some shopping for the planned makan2
We went to Balad, and here was abang with his big notebook! I told him repeatedly [REPEATEDLY sampai berbuih2 mulut] to tear off the page that contained our shopping list..but he refused! Kelihatanlah seperti student yang tersesat di pasar.
Us in one of the stalls, selling big fruits and veges. The size of this cabbage was approximately twice the sice of my face. The size of a an egg-plant can be up to the size of a football haha
Abang in another stall.. I can tell you, buying 7 chickens, 8kg of potatoes, 2 big cabbages, a big plastic bag of carrots, another big plastic bag of egg-plant, onions, garlics and more.. isn't 1 happy thing to do. They are HEAVY! Next we went to a new shopping complex, C-Town (they claim that household things are cheaper there). By the time we arrived home, it was 4.30pm GOSH!
Problems came one after another. 1st I complaint of inadequate utensils, forcing abang to borrow from his neighbours. I needed a big pot to cook the rice, and a neighbour lent his..which was leaking, and repaired by putting a plaster (Handiplast to be specific! Forgot to take a pic of that one) I wasn't very convinced though, probably a suture would be better~ Then we borrowed an electric blender from another neighbour, well...it threatened to blow up..so we had to borrow another blender. Time was running out, and abang being a good helper (who actually cut his hand when I requested for his help to wedge the potatoes, cut his hand for the second time when he tried to peel the garlic), in the end I knew I had to deal with the palpitation practically ALONE. Don't get me wrong though..he was more than eager to help.. a good runner boy indeed hehe running to the nearby grocery store more than once.. P/s I forgot to mention that abang tried baking chocolate cake (kesian betul birthday boy kena bake cake sndiri huu) tapi tak jadi pulak.. Never mind I''ll try to bake another one for your groupmates k (huu asyik mintak je nak kek nak bg groupmates dia huu)
Precisely at 10pm..abang's friends came to fetch the food. Farfalle was all mushed up (ni abang yg hancurkan k sewaktu dia nak gaul2 hehe), didn't manage to make coleslaw and 1 of the rice (cooked 2 pots of rice, 9kg in total) was not perfectly cooked (ada jelatah sket2), so we decided to finish cooking it the next day. All in all everything was okay, I took my bath and had a good night sleep while Abang enjoyed the food downstair.
The next day, the I had my breakfast of nasi maqlubah (which I personally think was quite tasty haha), but in the evening it became rotten. So we threw away the rice, tried to save the chickens and made roasted chicken with black pepper instead, as well as the coleslaw :)
Well that's about all.. an experience indeed, and I'm happy that at least I managed to make something for Abang's birthday hehe. Now..the CaKes....
The other day abang beli banyak Strawberry, tapi MASAM!! I didn't know what to do with em, so I made an omelette for abang, and put the strawberries of course not for the taste but for the look hehe. And I laughed out loud (LOL) alone in the kitchen for I felt like preparing a meal for a small kid hehe.
NOW THE STORY..
For the one who had allowed me to enjoy her breastmilk and grow strong...
For the one who had chosen to give me love and raised me up..
For the one who had patiently tolerated my tantrum and emotional burst..
For the one who has always been there for me to turn to...
For the one who has taught me to be a good muslimah..
For the one who has always made me understood the responsibility of an 'abd of God
For the one who has always painted my life in wonderful colours..
For the one who have done everything for me that not even a soul can compare..
For the one whom I can't ever forget to love, and to cherish in my doa...
I love you, dear UMMI
No presents on this Mother's day, but a warm memory of me and you..
And tears that spell a never ending love..
And my humble prayer that you'll have a grand life in the hereafter..
With Love, from Batul
Untuk mak yang telah mengandungkan abang 9 bulan..
Untuk mak yang bertarung nyawa bagi mengizinkan abang menatap wajah dunia..
Untuk mak yang telah menyusukan abang dengan susu dari tubuhnya..
Untuk mak yang membanting tulang demi menyuapkan rezqi Allah kepada abang..
Untuk mak yang telah berpenat lelah mendewasakan abang..
Untuk mak yang membuatkan abang mengerti hakikat hidup seorang hamba..
Untuk mak yang sentiasa meneguhkan abang..
Untuk mak yang menjadi tempat abang mengadu dan melepaskan kejerihan hidup..
Untuk mak yang mempercayai Maryam mengambil alih tugasan menjaga abang..
Untuk mak yang menerima diri ini seadanya..
Untuk layanan istimewa yang mak yang tidak membezakan aku dari anak-anaknya..
Untuk mak yang selamanya aku dan abang sayang..
Selamat Hari Ibu..
Sesungguhnya kami tidak punya apa-apa untuk diberikan kepada mak
Pada hari yang tersangat istimewa bagi meraikan dirimu..
Melainkan sepotong doa agar kau dianugerahkan kehidupan yang terlalu indah
di syurga nanti..
Salam Sayang dari Maryam & A'thiq
KHAS UNTUK UMMI DAN MAK, KLIK SINI
When I looked at abang for the first time in real in 3 months.. I couldn't help myself but to comment every single thing..knape rambut abg x ok, knape abg kurus, itu kasut yg abg kata abg beli hr tu kan, ni seluar mana sb xpernah tgk sblum ni...etc.. truk betul haha