Stupid! Stupid! Sooo stupid!!!!!

We had class with our mentor Dr F today. The class should be on Friday but brought earlier, so that we can have a long nice holiday perhaps. I guess none of us was ready, it was such an ad hoc class, and the first short case class for paediatric. I was a bit nervous huhu. Each of us was nervous, I'm sure.
Finally the Dr arrived, I could at least feel relieved because there was no cerebral palsy patient in the ward, examining the nervous system was the last thing that i wanted. He brought us to a 16 year old male with cushingoid feature. A colleague had the honour to examine him, and I could see that he was surprised and not prepared. After some stumble and mumble from us to answer several questions, we finally moved to another patient.. and guess what? I was asked to examine the respiratory system..

An 11 year old girl who appeared healthy. Looking at her age, I moved to prop up her bed to 45 degree (that is what we do when examining an adult patient). Suddenly ,"Hey, what are you doing??!!!" Adoi dah kena tengking. "I want to prop up the bed to 45 degree" "Who teach you that?? Dalam buku mana?" Dr dah start marah2 haha. After few minutes of listening to him condemning hutchinson etc.. finally he asked me to proceed. This time around, i pulled the blanket. "You nak buat apa lagi ni????!!!!!!!!!!!!" kena tengking lagi. "I want to expose the patient, so to keep her modestry, i'd like to cover with the blanket..." "Sapa yg malu?? patient yang malu ke YOU yang malu??' I'd like to answer "both..." but i just kept quiet.. i could remember being extra shy at that age, a transformation age between a little girl and a teenager..with all the pubertal changes huu, and i could see that the patient was shy (if i were in her place i'd have cried huuu) but she acted tough, alhamdulillah. "Stupid, stupid, so stupid!!!" That was when i was smacked hard, but i remained smiling. i think i was actually grinning stupidly hehe. "Berapa kali dah i ajar you, dari 3rd year lagi, examine patient paeds as the patient is comfortable!!" Me (dalam hati jelah) "Paed was my first clinical posting 2 years ago, lucky if i can remember anything from paed huu"

My feeling at that time? Org bermuka tembok like me tentulah tidak berasa apa2, instead I was happy to learn something from a consultant as great as him. I remember that he once told us (when I was in year 3, now I actually remember something :p), during his time, 2 students attached to a specialist. He followed the specialist anywhere, and learnt clinical skills and gain knowledge from the specialist. It is totally different now, when many students attach to a lecturer, and most of the time, we do things on our own...

i felt like asking him, "Dr, can I attach with you? I really want to be great like you, I'd like to learn your clinical skills and everything else!!!" but I know he would just give a plain stare and perhaps.. another "Stupid!" huuu.

Luckily, the class today made me realize that I don't have much time to waste, 5 weeks of paediatric left. Now I'm willing to work hard insyaAllah :) But, raya first!!!!