Trying to build a home. Fullstop.

I have been delaying..for more than 1 month. Okay, I'm moving out. Adapting to a new environment isn't easy. Settling down isn't easy either. Now I start to question the decision- why of all things, I decided to move out from the hostel?? Oopps, I remember, it was the quest for a meaningful life ngeh~ oh well, now I clearly remember- the no-fridge, no-cooking in the mahallah, the rampant 'saman' activity, the...

I've been stufing the house with 'homely things' to make it bearable.. the sweet rose curtain, the yet-to-arrive cottagey white furnitures, the pinky toilet equipments, and of course the things that Ummi gave me (the cutleries, containers and all kinds of just-name-it kitchen thingies which she found in her kitchen) but still the house isn't a home..

I've tried spending time every now and then in the house, for few hours just to put myself at ease, being in the new house..Now I start to postulate, the thing that can transform it into a home are the nice smell of baking, the lovely scent of floor cleaner, the fresh aroma of newly washed laundries. Huu probably my bread machine is the thing that I need!! :p

I told abang, the house feels so empty, so unbearable..huu seriously I'm having a psychiatric problem. I just don't know how to fit in.. Or is it just that I don't want to miss the delicious Kuey Teow Kungfu from the mahallah cafe ?? (haha I buy it practically everyday)

Ahh I'm so dumbfounded.. and planning for another trip to go back home.. the dirty KL is a home indeed.. not in the mood to do anything anyway.. with another 2 weeks of ortho left..I kinda hope exam will take place tomorrow, and I will have my holiday huu, but then I'm not prepared, but yep time travels too slowly, and that gives me all the reason to go back again..hoping that time will crawl faster..really not in the mood to do anything...

I have to go to OT tomorrow.. sgtla malas..

I have on call tomorrow... sgt laaaaaaaaaaaa malassssssssss

Uh-uh, what have you done to the real Maryam????? psssssss........ Awal muharram baru je lepas.. New year pulak sket lagi, tp aku semakin malas... Astaghfirullah. Kalau orang tanya, di mana semangat kamu? Semangat saya ada di Jordan huuuu. Maaflah kepada abang yang setiap hari terpaksa tadah telinga melayan aku yg rindu2 kat abang, suke nangis2 lg ehehe.

Abang's final exam is approaching, another 2 weeks to go.. Chaiyok abang! Go abang go (dinyanyikan dlm tune Inspector Gadget ok). Go for your dream!! Me? Dream dlm tido zzz :D


Khairunnisa' said...

Salam maryam al-batull what a nice name :) actually awk blajar kt mana? bestnya merancang nak hias rumah..

chayok maryam..jgn sedey!~ tahun baru will come, truskan tanam azam (saya mengingtakan diri sy jgk)

Ummu Ameer said...

thanks ukhti :) maryam belajar di uia kuantan..