Oh yes I arrived home 3 days ago... and I've been busy ever since.. settling few things, like arranging for faheem's school, who's going to take care of him when I work, shopping for abang's things, unpacking 100++kg of luggages, I traced the route to a hospital where I plan to do my HO (its hukm, and oh my I can't imagine travelling to and fro between subang permai and hukm), finishing my resume and tomorrow I am due for the SPA interview..
Hectic. Tiring. Yet I still have time to miss my other half. Oh yes I do feel like I'm living with only half of the body haha. Apa khabar la cintaku disana ye?
I'm the type of wife that has this orthodox belief that a wife's place is with the husband, and by saying that, i really mean that a wife should be with the husband at all time haha. Because of that belief, I followed abang to school (when Faheem attended hadhanah), I joined abang attending programs and meetings, Faheem and me went with abang to the mosque.. and whenever I prepare our dishes in the kitchen, I like it when abang come along (and do nothing) huuu. Apa jenis isteri lah ni ;p And because of that belief, I like to bring my pillow and blanket to the lounge (where abang put his study table and burn the midnight oil), crumpled on the floor besides him and sleep. Well I guess it's not hard to imagine a man studying a table with the wife crumpled on the floor like a cat. guess what? faheem has adopted that very habit and bring his blanket with him everywhere.
A conversation like below is such a common thing in our house
Ab: ayang, kalau ada air chocolate best jugak ni
Me: ok, ayang buat tapi abang kena teman
Ab: la.. baik abg buat je dah sampai dapur tu
Me: xpela ayg buat, abg teman je
maka abang terpaksa la tag along ke dapur sambil pandang2 dinding waktu isteri dia bancuhkan air hahaha. kejam x?
And because of that belief, I decided to come back to Malaysia, no matter how ironic it sounds. We think abang needs some personal time to focus on his study, without any distraction from me or faheem. abang needs to attend study groups, abang needs to be a real student, and for just a while, be free from the huge responsibility of a husband, a buddy, and a dad. I don't want his 'married' status become a fitnah to his study, and definitely I am willing to let him go for just a while during this crucial moment.
When he sent us to the airport, I didn't cry as hard as before, probably because I have set in my mind that it won't be long before we can meet again and enjoy being in each others' arms. Moga Allah murahkan rezqi kami utk bertemu semula..
Ambillah peluang menjadi 'bujang' seketika utk focus pada study
Ambillah peluang berjauhan sedetik, utk kita renew cinta
berat mata memandang, berat lagi hati yang merasai
Berat abang rasa memberi keizinan kami pulang,
berat lagi ayang rasa berjauhan dari suami
Hakikat hidup itu selalu mendambakan pengorbanan
Dan adat perjuangan mengharungi onak duri
Kejayaan itu tidak akan mudah digenggam
Kerana ada kemanisan yang menanti
Kemanisan yang abang tak dapat rasai sekarang
Tapi akan terzahir bila suatu hari nanti abang berjaya
Dan mampu memandang pada pengorbanan dan kepahitan lalu
Sambil berkata, "Alhamdulillah! Semua ini aku raih dengan jerih perih!"
Ayang dan Faheem tidak jemu menghitung hari utk bersama abang semula!
selamat berjuang abang!