Perihal anak

Faheem is fast turning 3. And that simply means, the question "bila nak dapat adik ni?" is being bombarded like a bomb non-stop. Dush. dUsh. DUSH! And I keep asking myself, am I ready to undergo that journey all over again? Or is abang ready?

You know I keep wondering, what makes a mom wants to become a mom again. Of course once you are a mom you will be one, forever. But what makes a mom wants to become pregnant again? Hmmm.... Quoting from a friend, once you become parents, you have to reduce your degree of 'spouse' and increase your degree of 'parents' means you become a father rather than a husband, or a mommy rather than a wife.. OUCH.

Abang asked me when do I plan to have the second one.. I said I don't know. Abang said probably after finishing housemanship, and my housemanship is finishing soon.. I said err, probably not in the next 5 years.. That's the timeline I offered when I gave birth to faheem hehe, and now faheem is 3, i still give the same answer ;p Probably the 5-year duration is such a subjective period of which Allah only can decide..  Who know I might announce a positive UPT anytime soon haha.

Probably I have not had enough of romantic dinner with Abang, late night movie with Abang, going out with Abang, snuggling with him while he reads the Quran, always ready to lepak in the masjid whenever he asks me to.. I still feel the emptiness when he goes to work, longing for him to come back home asap.

I always wonder, what really motivates one to have another child..? Probably because the pressure is really building for me, because one never grows younger..

I guess it's just that I'm not ready yet.. I'll be ready one day insyaAllah.. :)

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