Part 3

From the labour room, I was discharged to ward 6D, 2 people in a room. I was really sleepy. so was Faheem. So I slept without taking my breakfast. Abang went home to take a nap. Ummi & my aunty & uncle came at around 1pm, only then I woke up. Abah departed to US a day before I gave birth attending some sort of a course, and he is still in US so he has never met Ameer Faheem. Tried to finish my cake. Ameer Faheem refused to wake up, so I had some difficulty to breastfeed him. His blood sugar level was measured, it was at such a low level of 1.4. I was threatened (by the nurse of course) that if I fail to correct that level to at least 3.5, Faheem would be admitted to NICU. I tried hard to feed him. The nurses were helpful (despite their laser tongues huu) in teaching me how to breastfeed him, and how to wake him up. Punyala susah. Everytime nak menyusukan dia, terpaksa jentik tapak kaki, bogelkan dia supaya dia sejuk, stimulate bawah dagu supaya dia suck huuu.... and I couldn't sleep the whole night. I had to sit on a chair, breastfeed him, and every half an hour, the nurse would check his sugar level. I was damn worried. He didn't even cry when he was injected huuu. Obviously he didn't cry for milk.

That was when I started to think nonsensely. I inspected him hard. Asked abang, Faheem nampak macam ada micrognathia tak. Haha. Abang kata macam ada. But there was no other syndromic features. And obviously he was not hypotonic. Mak apa la ni huuu, terlebih risau. That night I succeeded in increasing his sugar level from 1.4 to 1.8 to 2.2 to 2.9 and finally 3.1 Alhamdulillah :)

The next day, I was discharged after 24 hours of observation. Went home Alhamdulillah :) On his second day of life, I still had to take off his clothes (sampai bogel terus ok) to wake him up for feeding. And I noticed that he started to have jaundice. So the next day, we bought him to a Klinik Kesihatan. It was quite high, but hadn't reached the level which requires admission. We had to come again and check the bilirubin level in 2 days time.

On Day 3, Ameer Faheem had just found his voice! And he cried so loud everytime he feels hungry :) That was really nice. On Day 3, for the first time, we went out together as a family of 3 hehe. I feel so complete with Abang and Baby Faheem. We went to JPN to make his IC and Birth Cert, then we went to Giant, By now, Faheem fed every hour. On Day 5, we went back to Kuantan to settle down few things before abang goes back to Jordan. Faheem buat perangai pulak waktu photoshoot for our magazine, menangis kuat2 because he was hungry huu...

Tido-makan-prott-ngade

semangat tak abang mkn.. hehe

i'm trying to figure out the best way to blog with the little dude on my lap...sleeping. Tuan Faheem. well, really i should say 'yes sir!' each time he demands anything huhu. mcm abang kata, faheem ni tido-makan-prottt-ngade haha. that's what he does everyday. prott tu maksudnya dia berak :p Lepas tu suka mengade2. nangis pun bunyi ngade2 jugak, but once he shows his true self, well at one point i thought i could turn deaf. badan kecik suara kuat!

so this is the continuation of the story..

oh i forgot i was given 2 doses of dexamethasone for fetal lung maturation. SAKIT GILE and the worst injection i have ever experienced in my life so far! after the tocolytic regime, i was put on maintenance dose of nifedipine (adalat). The contraction did reduce in intensity and frequency. I was a bit upset.. well i wanted to give birth after all! i did not sleep the whole night except for 1 hour. the place was ar conditioned and cosy, but i wanted to be with abang. obviously he was not allowed to be there with me, so he went home at around 1.30am

The next day, he came early. Alhamdulillah Hosp Sg Buloh (HSB) is just 15mins drive from my house, bringing along some breakfast which ummi had prepared. I still had a 2 in 10 contractions so during the morning round, the Dr decided to allow labour progress yeay! They stopped the nifedipine. I met abang occasionally. They wanted to transfer me to ward 6b, but it was full. so i had to be in the screening ward for the whole day, not given a bed anyway. i was so depressed and in pain and tired. lepak kat bilik tv je huu. abah and ummi told me to request for a 1st class ward but unfortunately they don't have any in HSB. I cried and cried, and planned for an AOR (discharged at own risk) and go to a private hosp. Just when abang was arranging things, they informed me that a bed was available in the ward, at around 6pm! So we cancelled the AOR plan.

Alhamdulillah the ward was cosy as well despite the 3rd class status. 4 patients shared a toilet, and hot shower was available. It was spacious, and I didn't have any difficulty to pray beside my bed. The only despicable thing was abang was not allowed to stay with me, and I survived the days alone. But he came during each visiting hours between 12pm-2pm and 4.30pm to 7.30pm.

During the round the next day, the Specialist decided to observe me further. Well they wanted to have a 24hours of free of contraction period before they would allow me to be discharged. I was so stressed. The last timed contraction was at 8pm the previous day. I did have few minor contractions but i didn't want to report. desperate nak balik rumah..

Specialist: Awak nak balik nak buat apa?

Me: saya nak balik kuantan

S: kenapa?

Me: kelas

S: Awak nak bersalin kat mana?

Me: depends waktu ada labour symptom, saya kat mana. Kuantan or Sg Buloh

S: Awak balik kuantan malam ni, awak akan beranak kat hosp bentong

Me:............

He was a fine Dr, very understanding :) So he said, he wanted to do a doppler ultrasound first before dischaging me. After the round, few medical students came and clerked me, and presented my case to their lecturer and did a short case on me haha. I was then called for the ultrasound..

The US revealed an AFI of 4 (air ketuban sikit sgt) and the placenta was heavily calcified.

S: Awak tidak akan beranak di Kuantan mahupun di Bentong. Awak akan beranak disini. (he said with a smile) haha.

Me: OK!

They decided to induce me, in view of the long standing oligohydramnios, plus i was by then 36 weeks pregnant, on-the-dot. I called abang, telling him that the Dr planned to induce with max 3 doses of Prostin and if fail, i would end up being cut in C-sect. And because of the oligo, there was a high risk to get fetal distress and end up being operated on as well. Abang asked me how did i feel, i said i was fine with the plan. So I was transferred to 6c for induction..

At 3pm, they inserted the first dose of Prostin. Tengok jiran2 yg sama kena induce, sume macam relax je uhuu. The contractions become intense after 1 hour, but i still could sleep, so i slept. abang came at 4.30pm, the contractions slowly becoming less. Yang peliknya, sepanjang duduk ward, abang dtg visit, tp bila sampai ward, dia makan my food and slept on my bed! dia kata suasana tenang dia rasa ngantuk plak haisyyy!! I lost my appetite.

At 9pm, they planned for the second dose of prostin. But when they examined me, the os has dilated 2cm. they did S&S (try besarkan jalan manually, SAKIT GILE lagi, sama macam dexa, and i cried). They didn't insert the second prostin. At 10pm, the contraction has become morbidly severe. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't lie still. I went to the toilet every few minutes, berjalan2 dalam ward, kejap duduk, kejap baring. Tengok org lain, tido dgn lena lagi huuu. I called abang, suruh abang tido takut2 tgh2 malam kena dtg hospital. Rasa macam tak lama dah nak bersalin. I tried to eat the secret recipe cake that kakak brought (haha siap pesan kat kakak suruh bawak kek, kemaruk melampau), konon2 to gain energy to push out the baby.

At 3pm, the pain was too severe, that i thought it was continuous. They were actually strong contractions of 4 in 10. Waktu ni dah menangis2 tak tahan sgt, but i still remembered to practice the deep breathing technique. Called abang, suruh datang even though i knew he was actually not allowed to stay with me. Nurse bagi je abang masuk ward, alhamdulillah. Minta pethidine. The nurse agreed but she had to do the CTG first and check the os first. So A HO came and checked, it was 3cm tight. But the baby's head has descended to a very low position. Nurse nak buat CTG but she took nearly 1 hour to get a reading because the baby was sleeping. Haisyy time ni plak baby sibuk nak tido. Sambil menangis2 tu, bleh plak ulang2 cakap "Faheem cepatla bangun, mummy sakit ni".

Nurse: Awak minum air selusuh ke?

Me: tak (dalam hati: manalah nak dpt supply air selusuh ni huu)

Nurse: contraction kuat sgt ni. 4 in 10. Ada rasa nak teran?

Me: no

Abang's arrival was such a relief! I gripped his hand tight, abang kept reminding me to recite 'La hawla wala quwwata illa billah' and I obeyed. Rasa sangat lega bila abang ada, and sempat terfikir macamana la agaknya if bersalin abang tak sempat balik dari Jordan huu. Sungguh cantik segala yang Allah aturkan.. At nearly 4am, I was given a jab of pethidine. I waited for the medicine to work, but I didn't think the pain lessened. At 5am, suddenly I had this urge to expel the baby out and I became anxious because I was at level 6 and the labour room was on the ground floor. Terus jerit, "Nurse, saya nak teran!!" The nurses checked the os again, 5cm. The HO kelam kabut ambik darah. I couldn't lie still because the contractions were very painful. They pushed a wheelchair to my bedside and asked me to sit on it. I was like, what???? Nak keluar sangat dah ni! Tapi duduk jugak and dengan sangat lajunya, I was pushed to the labour room. What a journey huu siap turun lif lagi. The moment I was on the bed in labour room 8, another HO and few nurses came in. It was around 5.15am. I saw them acting very cool huu. I cried, 'saya nak teran sekarang'. Nampak delivery set tak buka lagi. One of them checked and said 'fully' (10cm). suddenly a nurse said, 'janganla nangis, awak nak teran, teran betul2' haha it reminded me of my O&G days in the labour room and listening to the same thing being told to the patients. I don't know why did i cry, and i didn't realize i was crying until she said that, probably because i was so nervous as opposed to painful sensation. When i started to push, the pain automatically disappeared. nurse cakap, "kalau sakit, teran panjang2, curi nafas dan sambung" how familiar that line sounded. But i just pushed continuously because i couldn't feel any pain. by then i started to feel drowsy, the pethidine started to take its effect on me. but i could still remember the things that i used to tell to patients: teran panjang-panjang, jangan teran kat muka, jangan angkat punggung etc. They cheered on me, i could hear and feel the episiotomy being done (it was painful by the way), and then i could feel the baby's head came out. All the while, abang helped to elevate my head, and i could hear him reporting, "ayang, sambung teran, kepala dah nampak 1/3" and then "ayang, kepala dah half keluar", and then "kepala dah tinggal 1/4 je lagi" hehe. 5.27am. Then the body came out. Abang kissed me and I fell asleep. I didn't even hear the baby crying. The nurse placed him on my chest, I cuddled him. Fell asleep again. One of them took him away. I fell asleep again. Woke up again and asked with a slurred speech (I was extremely sleepy), "Apgar score seminit berapa?"

Nurse:9

Me: OK.

Fell asleep again.

HO: Saya nak jahit ni

Me: OK. guna LA ke?

HO: guna

Me: OK

Nurse: tapi utk skin tak guna.

Me: sakit..

Nurse: kita bagi entonox k.

Me: OK

The nurse passed the mask for entonox. They stitched the epi. When only the skin was left to be stitched, they informed me that it was going to be a bit painful. I quickly inhaled the entonox.. suddenly

CRASH!!!

HO & Nurse: Eh kenapa ni?? (i think they thought i collapsed)

Me: saya ngantuk sangat.. (terjatuhkan mask atas lantai huu)

Lepas siap jahit, they helped me to change into a set of fresh clothes. And I vomited few times.. kenapa entah...

to be continued..

Moments to be shared :D part 1

konon nak masuk, tapi dah tutup..

di gua kelam

first time abg dtg teluk cempedak with me

padang besar, perlis..

Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah and alhamdulillah..

Ameer Faheem al-Waseem ibnu Muhammad al-Athiq

(the handsome intelligent prince)

has safely arrived into this world on 19/1/2011 at 5.27 am. Alhamdulillah again..

Really no word can express the joy brought by the tiny breathing bundle... and my hands still have this difficulty to type after a long break + lenguh dukung faheem :p

I want to write down every single plot of the wonderful story, but perhaps i'll take some time :D. We are terribly deprived of sleep, and yet enjoying every moment with Faheem (as have been mentioned earlier, we don't call him Ameer because we plan to name each of our boy with the name Ameer :) insyaAllah)

So here goes...

Abang arrived in Malaysia on Thursday, 6/1/2011 9.30 am, a day before my final Paediatric clinical exam. I fetched him at KLIA and that very evening we went back to Kuantan. I sat for my exam the next day and then we spent our days in Telok Chempedak and around Kuantan. I really did lot of walking, with the intention and hope to induce the labour process haha. The coming monday, I started my Surgical posting. Managed to present a case, attended few operations and did some other stuff. On Thursday evening, we went back to Shah Alam as we planned to go back to Kedah the next day for abang hasn't met his parents.. Ummi wasn't very keen with the idea of me going back to kedah in such an advanced stage of pregnancy, but being the stubborn me, i said everything would be fine. I really exhausted myself because I intentionally wanted to give birth asap haha.

So off we went to Kedah on Friday morning. Arrived in Kedah at around 8pm. The next morning, I asked abang to go shopping at Padang Besar ( I have never been there even once), Abang agreed so we went there with my MIL and SIL. Bought Faheem's clothes (the price was really CHEAP!!!!), and on the way back, we went to Gua Kelam (perut boyot pun ada hati lagi nak jalan masuk gua!! hehe). Arrived home at around maghrib, we then went out again to visit our relatives. Makan buah dengan sangat banyak kat rumah dia- mata kucing, jambu, tembikai n ntah ape2 lagi..

The next morning we woke up early to prepare for our journey back to KL, then straightaway to Kuantan. Planned to depart at 9am, but when we were having our breakfast of nasi lemak which Abah bought, I started to feel nausea and abdominal pain. I thought it was due to my heinous act the previous night stuffing all kind of fruits into my tummy, then the pain become more severe and I had to pay few visits to the toilet. I had diarrhea..

Feeling extremely nauseous, I tried to take a short nap, but then I noticed that I had regular contractions. That was when I started to think of parenteral diarrhea & vomiting. Oh by the way, it's common for me to have diarrhea and vomiting during menstruation. I still refused to believe that it was labour pain. I slept until zohor, mak checked on me, risau takut2 nak bersalin. I said cirit birit. so everybody assumed it was gastroenteritis.

Waktu zohor, the pain has lessened. I performed my prayer with abang, but while reciting the doa, I experienced the first real contraction pain, till I cried, still clad in my telekung. I lost my appetite for lunch, and then straightaway headed to KL. On the road, I felt fine, and asked abang to go to the Lost World of Tambun! (huu dasar tak sedar diri!) We arrived at around 6pm, the place has closed so we just snapped few pics at the main entrance :p, and continued our journey to KL. We then stopped for maghrib-isya prayers at R&R Tapah. At 8pm, the journey continued, and I started to feel the pain again. I wasn't sure whether it was crampy or contraction pain, progressively becoming severe until at 1 point berguling2 dalam kereta huu. Asked abang to stop at any toilet, then I saw the signboard with 'Sungai Buloh 69km'. Ya Allah, how impossible that 69km figure seemed to be, for me to go through. I knew abang started to speed (I'm the type of wife who always ask the husband to slow down to 80kmph haha), but I couldn't care, I was so in pain. In Sungai Buloh, we directly went to the Hospital Sungai Buloh. It was around 10pm..

True enough I had a 3 in 10 contraction of 30-40 seconds, and I was only 35 weeks 5 days pregnant. They did a urine test, said it was due to urinary tract infection as the leukocyte was 1+. I was admitted and started on a tocolytic regime of Adalat.

Huu

Lamanya tak menulis.. tak ada mood + selalu saja tak sihat..
Saat2 menghitung hari untuk melahirkan Ameer, saat2 bergelar wanita mengandung hanya tersisa, saat upaya mengugut untuk pergi, saat semangat terbang entah ke mana... ke mana lagi harus dipalingkan wajah, dan meminta simpati, melainkan kepada Dia yang maha mendengar..lagi maha mengasihani.. ah sekurang2nya membuatkan diri in tersedar bahawa kita tidak pernah ditinggalkan bersendiri... akhir2 ini, terasa seperti saban hari mengenangkan kisah Maryam bintu Imran, mengandungkan Nabi Isa berseorangan, melahirkan juga berseorangan.. betapa hati berharap Maryam bintu Azizuddin juga akan begitu.. tapi ketabahan tentulah tidak hadir hanya dengan berharap..

Rasanya ungkapan yang tidak bosan diungkapkan, sejak awal mengandung, bahkan setiap waktu sentiasa meniti di bibir, sehinggalah saat melahirkan rasa terlalu hampir.. mengandung itu payah. Memang payah. Pengalaman itu berbeza. Ada yang 'steady', ada yang memang tergigit peritnya.. Kasihan abang, setia menelan segala keluhan, walaupun pasti dia sudah letih mendengar semua itu.. Sakit itu seperti lepas satu, satu datang bertamu.. sehinggakan ambil injection ATT pun demam dan terpaksa dapatkan MC.. Dan sejak akhir2 ini demam itu seperti rutin. Exam pun baru separuh yang selesai, masih berbaki lagi separuh untuk diselesaikan Jumaat ini insyaAllah.. tp aku sendiri tak dapat bayangkan bagaimana untuk pulang ke Kuantan. MAS says NO, tapi tengok bas pun aku fobia.. sekadar naik kereta untuk ke kedai dekat2 dengan Ummi pun terasa begitu menyiksakan.. especially the contractions, and the nausea.

Ye aku nausea lagi. And I can go on without food for days.. tak ubah seperti sebelum mengandung.. pun kesian kat Ummi yang asyik tanya nak masak lauk apa.. I answer, "I want to eat cocoa crunch" or aku habiskan air yogurt dalam fridge.. Tapi air yogurt and cocoa crunch tak berkhasiat! "Kesian Ameer", Ummi would say.

Hari ni terasa seperti air ketuban terlalu sikit.. (memang AFI dah low sejak sebulan lalu kot), aku jadi risau. Disebabkan air ketuban yang terlalu sikit, rasanya itulah punca Ameer sangat irritable, pantang tersentuh sikit, mesti uterus akan contract :( Resulting in me sakit perut sokmo.. Arahan Dr supaya buat weekly CTG pun aku abaikan, tp hari ni terasa seperti nak buat CTG.. Tapi bimbang ditahan di wad lagi... macamane nak exam Jumaat ni??? Really I worry enough but most of the times, ketidaklaratan membuatkan aku abaikan semua benda. Sakit gigi sejak sekian lama, tapi the dentists do not want to do anything. Dan aku merengek2 kat abang nak induce labour at 37 weeks huuu... Entahlah terasa sangat serabut.